Suburban (in)Sanity

Family Holiday Movie Rental Roundup

So another holiday weekend has come and almost gone. We've hardly left the house in four days. I, being a wise and intelligent mom (this ain't my first rodeo...) visited the handy dandy redbox nearest our home on Wednesday morning to procure us some Holiday Rental Delights.To save you some trouble, here's my extremely opinionated view of the movies we saw this weekend:

Green Lantern

Green Lantern - Okay, first, what's the big deal with the lead actor? He's cute, but do people really think he was more deserving than Bradley Cooper for People's ahemist man alive this year? Have you *seen* The A-Team? Oy. Speaking of which, saw it again on cable a few weeks ago and still highly recommend. It's clever, a little violent, but mostly funny. Okay for ages 10+.

But back to Green Lantern. No. On second thought. Don't go back to Green Lantern. ("Over Macho Grande?")

It just wasn't that good. The plot, ugh. But fine. It's a superhero movie, I can adjust my plot standards. But the acting didn't make up for it. There was this feeble attempt to make a strong female character by having her be a fighter pilot, but then the rest of the movie they kept putting her in 4" teeter-tottery heels and having her swoon on balconies waiting for her beau. Barf. She was cute, though, I'd see her in other movies. The special effects were just uber cheesy to me. And it was definitely entirely too long. The kids found it scary in many parts (and these are kids who are not easily scared...they've watched all Star Wars movies, all Harry Potters, all Lord of the Rings, and were more scared by Green Lantern. Sigh.)

Karen Recommendation: Skip it (I'm glad we only spent $1 at Red Box on this one...)

Kid Recommendation: Too scary (ages 8 & 10)

Spy Kids 4

Next Up, Spy Kids 4, a true made-for-kids movie.

This is a cute run in the Spy Kids universe, actually called Spy Kids All the Time in the World in 4D. The first movie was always the best, but this is a cute side tale with Jessica Alba playing a stepmother (who is actually the spy) to two kids who become Spy Kids. There's an awesome part for both Carmen and Juni from earlier SK movies (dang they grew up!) While I fiddled on my ipad most of the movie, it was certainly tolerable adult fare. Kids really enjoyed it. Funny automoton dog who poops out blasting ball bearings, perhaps the kids' favorite part.

Karen Recommendation: Go for it

Kid Recommendation: Two thumbs up

Ocean's Eleven

Thanksgiving night proper, we rented Ocean's Eleven via On Demand for $4. Yes, we watched it with our children, we're quite horrible parents. ;) Actually, other than some swear words and cigar smoking and drinking, it's actually quite a tame movie. The kids really like whodunnit style movies with puzzles that you have to work to figure out (they've watched the movie Clue a dozen times, trying to anticiapte all the various possible outcomes or explain the puzzle. Which, fair warning, has quite a bit of raunchy stuff in it, though it's mostly veiled/referred to obliquely.) This is one of my all-time favorite movies and the kids thought it was pretty interesting, though the youngest was less enthralled. 

Karen Recommendation: Always love this movie

Kid Recommendation: Probably best for ages 10 & up, the 8 year old was a little less engaged

Super 8

The last movie we watched this weekend was Super 8, and it was by far the best movie we've seen in a long time, Harry Potter 7 parts 1 and 2 notwithstanding. It was definitely pretty scary, though. There were many cling-to-mommy/daddy moments, however both kids were totally engaged the whole time and the scary parts were tempered well. There were several surprising "snatchings" in the movie that were the primary cause of mommy-clinging. The main characters are really relatable for kids and it's really the kids' story, which is different from a lot of movies where kids have starring roles. Even Spy Kids 4, to a degree, isn't really the kids' story the way Super 8 is.

The violence/scary parts aren't particularly gory, and in several cases someone is "snatched" that later turns up alive (though some seem to meet untimely ends, too.) The story revolves around a boy creating a movie, using his Super 8 camera, but mostly it's about his friend who helps and the relationships this boy (the friend) creates in the course of a few days in early summer in the late 70s in an Ohio steel town.

I don't want to give too much of it away, but it's a fantastic movie, very interesting, and worth every penny of the $3.60 we ended up spending since we returned it late to redbox. ;)

Karen Recommendation: Highly recommend, even if you don't have kids

Kid Recommendation: Highly recommend, but keep a parent close for hiding eyes and/or clinging when needed.

Speaking of redbox, a few reasons I absolutely adore redbox:

1) Movies for around a buck.

2) Many machines are outside, making it almost a drive-thru experience (can certainly leave kids/pets in the car.)

3) It *doesn't matter* which redbox you return the movies to. Anywhere, anytime. Let me say that again. You can return your redbox movie to ANY redbox anywhere!

4) There are redbox machines north, south, east and west of me. Anywhere I might be going I will likely be passing a machine, further easing the rent/return paradigm.

5) There aren't any "late fees" - just an additional rental fee for any missed nights. No harm, no foul. If you fail to return your movie for 25 or more days they just assume it's yours and charge you a flat rate (25-35 depending on whether you rented DVD or Blu-ray.)

6) You can reserve online, so the title you want is there for certain. Or you can scope out your machines in your area and figure out which ones have the larger box (therefore greater inventory) and rent THERE, since odds are greater that your title will be in stock. Then you can return it anywhere that is convenient.

While they don't have every movie ever made and there's sometimes delays on which movies are avaialble via redbox when, it's still a fantastic rental solution for the busy family. I'm a little tired of getting ripped for $6+ On Demand HD rentals that have poor playback quality. At least with a DVD I know what I'm getting.

So - what movies did you watch over the holiday weekend and would you recommend them?

 

 

Harry Potter 7 Part 1 - Review

3 minutes, 30 seconds. That's how long I lasted in watching Harry Potter 7 Part 1 before crying. I was crying again at 22 minutes, and again at the 34 minute mark.

First, a note on spoilers. I have to assume if you're reading this post you either haven't read the books and don't care (or you would have read them by now for crying out loud) or are seeking information about the movies. If what I say next surprises you in any way or diminishes your enjoyment of the movie because it's a spoiler, well freaking leave this post til you've seen the movie and then come back! Okay? I don't want to be twitchy about not spoiling it for anyone. This is the seventh movie of the most popular book series ever (at least in my opinion) - if you don't know what's going to happen and are going to get upset about finding it out...read this later!

Okay, now that that's sorted...

One more administrative point because someone is sure to ask -- the reason we got to see the movie tonight was we were invited to attend as guests at a corporate event. Friend of a friend kind of thing. No, there weren't extra tickets, sorry.

The 22 minute mark was Hedwig. Oh, Hedwig. :( 

The three and a half minute mark was something that isn't dramatized in the book at all, but was done beautifully. It's Hermione, obliviating her parents. Tears just slipped out as I watched her face, and then the blankness on the actors' faces, and as the pictures of her throughout the room fade away.

I cried again at about the 34 minute mark (by now I'm just guessing, because I didn't write it all down...) when the death eaters have caught up with Ron, Harry, and Hermione at the coffee shop in London, and the three decide to erase the memories of the bad guys (after some debate.) The look on Hermione's face as she casts the obliviate spell. 

Ah, this is what we watch these movies for. Torturing ourselves with the growth, the pain, the knowledge of what that one spell means for her, what she's had to give up, what they've all had to give up, what's at stake. 

Over and over, the movie rewarded me, an ardent fan whose read the books each twice, and books 1-6 somewhere north of four or five times each. The movie rewarded me with knowing more than just what was on the screen, knowing why these things mattered, how much they mattered. 

It made it so that when Bellatrix threw the knife as Dobby house-elf-disapparated the crew and there was a swirl of indistinct color, I was crying already because I knew what had happened. 

Yes, I cried on and off the whole movie. I cried when Hedwig died, when Ron's dad and George embraced upon returning to the Burrow early-on, having successfully evaded the death eaters, when we saw a replay of Dumbledore's falling scene from movie 6, when Hermione, with hands bloody after Ron was splinched in one of their narrow escapes, stands up to set the protective spells, when Ron left, when Cedric died. Oh, scratch that last - different movie. But even bringing up the memory makes me tear up a little. Cedric before he was Edward. The book makes me cry there, too.

How was the movie? This is a hard question to answer. I was engrossed, the whole time. I was extremely annoyed when I discovered I needed to pee about 40 minutes in (how many crying episodes did I miss with that four minute potty break?) I can't stop thinking about Hermione obliviating her parents. I love it when the filmmakers surprise me like that. It's on par with the scene with Slughorn in movie 6 where he tells the story about the fish that Lily gave him that just poofed one day (the day she died.) 

The movie was wonderful. It was tremendously sad. There was a lot of action. There were some really funny bits (as is typical, Fred and George get most of the best parts.) 

It was just over 2 hours. They didn't bloat it with a ton of exposition, in fact there were times where the camera lingered on one of the main character's faces and we were left to fill in the massive blanks based on our knowledge of the books. I think the movies are still probably enjoyable for people who haven't read the books, but more as a visual feast than as a storyline that makes sense. But I think it's great that the filmmakers did something that I as a writer find so incredibly hard to do - they Resisted the Urge to Explain. It's worth studying how they did pack so much content (and even with so much content there's so much that's not dramatized, the bust of Rowena Ravenclaw is in Lovegood's house but nobody notices nor makes any connection to it, for example.) into just two hours and a bit (two twenty I think?)

What's missing? What's in the book but not on film? Well, part of George (Fred?)'s ear, for starters. He gets a torn ear, but it's not missing the way the book depicts. The scene with the Dursleys at the beginning is incredibly short, and Dudley doesn't get to tell Harry he doesn't think he's a waste of space. 

Hogwarts is completely missing, though that matches with the book for the most part. Neville has a delicious cameo when he stands up to the Death Eaters who stop the Hogwarts Express to tell them Harry's not there. 

Oddly, the Invisibility Cloak isn't there (or if it is it was only used during the scene when I had to take a potty break) - it's odd only because the Deathly Hallows are introduced late in the movie, the elder wand, the resurrection stone, the true cloak of invisibility. 

There's no Krum, the radio show they listen to isn't obviously Lee Johnson, they don't meet up with Dean, nor hear about the goblin and the fake sword of Griffendor (instead, this is treated at Malfoy Manor when the kids are brought before Bellatrix and Lucius, and Bellatrix goes on one of her crackpot-got-hit-with-the-crazy-stick rages about how the sword was removed from her vault. No idea if the second movie will talk about the fake sword or not. Doubtful because by this point they have used the sword to destroy the locket.)  

The movie takes us through about page 476 of the book. There's still a lot of book left, the Gringott's vault, the dragon, the battle for hogwarts, Harry dying, loads more opportunities for me to cry. But this piece did resolve well. We're left knowing it's open, but having seen closure of Dobby's death, and Ron returned. The movie ends with Voldemort taking the Elder wand from Dumbledore's grave, and it feels like the right place. 

Now, a bit about ages. We were there with two 9 year olds and an almost seven year old - who have listened to all seven books on audio, though it's been more than a year since we did. The movie ran a bit past bedtime, and Anastasia started getting fidgety after about 40 minutes. I do think, though she's mature and can handle much of what movies can throw at her in terms of action and intensity, it was a bit too intense for her. There were a pair of five or six year olds next to us and I really wondered whether they enjoyed it at all.

I think a solid understanding of the books is necessary to really appreciate the plot, since much of it speeds by you otherwise. The action sequences are phenomenal, the movies have grown up just as the characters have, everything was extremely polished, very high quality. The way they portray death eaters as moving on puffs of black smoke is so cool. There's even a car chase, though this being Harry Potter, it involves Harry and Hagrid in Sirius' flying motorcycle with sidecar and swirling death eaters.

The 9 year olds did great, they sat in front of us and were absorbed the whole time, though I did hear them explain things to each other from time to time. I think if you're going to take a younger one, make sure to go early enough in the day that you're not bumping up against bedtime like we were. I do think part of what was troubling for her, though, was that she was able to anticipate the upcoming events and was scared in advance, or didn't like the idea that the characters were going to get caught momentarily. We worked through it. 

There were a few spots that were startling that it's worth being aware of. When they first set foot in Grimmald place (there's warning because the building unpacks from the two next to it first) -- there's that Dumbledore scare charm that's startling. The bit in Godric's Hollow with the woman who has been possessed by Nagini. The snake comes back for a last try at getting Harry and Hermione and that's shocking as well. Early on the Muggle Studies teacher is killed mostly on-camera, and then there's a horrible anticipation after Voldy tells the snake that dinner's ready (and the snake snaps at the camera ultra-close.) Thankfully the darn thing is very obviously a computer image or I wouldn't be able to sit through the movie! There's a lot of dark stuff, even the retelling of the Tale of Three Brothers is dark, though beautifully done with a shadow-puppet style animation. It features a large towering figure of death, an implied knifing, and a hanging. Not your average Saturday afternoon at the movies fare for tots, get a sitter for the littlest ones, I recommend. 

But for the rest of us? The Harry Potter fans? The college kids who started reading HP when they were 10 and 11? The people who stayed up way past their bedtime, reading "one more chapter" even when dawn started creeping? The kids who didn't like to read til they picked up a HP book? The people who've devoted days and weeks of their lives to living mentally at Hogwarts, devouring the books and movies over and over?

It's immensely satisfying.

What about you? Have you seen the movie? Do you agree? What impression did you come away with?

Movie Review: Sorceror's Apprentice

We've had icky weather this week so the kids and I went to see Sorcerer's Apprentice today.

This isn't meant to knock the film, but by far the most exciting part for me was seeing the really awesome Harry Potter trailer on a big screen.

Premise: Balthazar, one of Merlin's three apprentices, is alive and kicking in New York City in 2000. He's looking for the "Prime Merlinian" (which I heard as "prime millenium" until the end, thinking that he was looking for the first of the group of kids who came of age this millenium..., but I digress.)

Nic Cage plays Balthazar, with greasy hair and a wicked cool long coat made out of some dead animal or another.

He's trying to find this prime because he needs the kid to destroy Morgana, Merlin's worst enemy, who is entrapped (along with Balthazar's love Veronica) in a nesting doll, which I will call the Matruschka of Evil.

He first finds the kid in 2000 through accident, the kid, as is only natural when encountering thousand-year-old sorcerers (he accidentally lets out the third of the three apprentices who went all evil and allied with Morgana) and crazy magic. After that scene there's a fast forward 10 years and we see same kid as a geeky college student with a penchant for physics living in NYC.

Reason 1 why I liked the film: the dinky NY apartment he lives in actually LOOKS like the size, scale, and cruddieness of what a college kid in the city would actually live in. No Friends'-style rent-controlled 2000 square foot palace.

Kid (whose name is David) plays with Tesla coils in his spare time, and pursues a love interest who "knew him back when he had a nervous breakdown." The to-be-expected moments of doubt, humorous exchanges with his "master" Balthazar, and reversals are perhaps a bit predictable, but in my experience the kids enjoy movies that follow a predictable path.

So my overall impression is largely positive. It was a fun movie, clocking in just under 2 hrs (though the listing online showed it to be 121 mins.) It's a straight PG movie, but I would suggest only those who are comfortable with some scenes of scary stuff would be comfortable. My 6.5 year old who is well-versed in pretty advanced fare (all the Harry Potters, LotR, etc.) was a bit scared. That surprised me. My almost 9 year old loved it, says it's one of the best movies he's ever seen.

The scary stuff was magic-movie scary, from the way the evil apprentice reformed out of bugs (eww!) to the anticipation of knowing there's a showdown between the good guys and bad coming up, and magic battles where they're winging fire and plasma bolts at each other. There are quite a number of little bits very late in the movie (when, not to spoil it too much for you, some bad guys are maybe being raised from the dead, think graveyards and skulls...) that I thought were a bit much, but I think most of my daughter's reaction to the "scary" stuff was because the movie is really dark (very few scenes in daylight), and the score played her emotions well. Again, I think this is not necessarily a sign of a bad movie, in fact it may be quite the opposite - she was feeling just what the moviemakers wanted her to.

Her fear didn't keep her from enjoying the movie, but I'd caution those parents of younger kids that this is not some cute live-action remake of the Disney Mickey Mouse Fantasia bit. Although there was a funny redo of that scene. There's also an excellent use of "these are not the droids you're looking for" even if I did see it coming from a mile away.

Overall I thought the story was interesting enough, the action was plentiful, and the story moved at a predictable but reasonably quick pace. Nic Cage isn't so bad to look at, and the nerd actor plays nerd really well. The love interest is very compelling on screen, I like her a lot. (her name is Teresa Palmer and she looks a lot like Brittany Murphy, or at least as I remember Brittany Murphy from back in the day.)

It's worth an afternoon at the theater, worth your $6+ a ticket (and hey - let me give it a positive shout-out for NOT going down the 3-D road, because hellooooo Hollywood - 3D is annoying please lay off.) Just watch with caution with kids 8 and under, it might be a little scary for them.

Movie review: Despicable Me

We've been looking forward to this movie for a while, thanks to having seen a few movies in the theater already this summer.

Adult reviewers give it two thumbs up. Kid reviewers do, too. It was very cute, very funny, not too long (hate it when animated movies overstay their welcome. 95-100 mins max. Two hours only if you're really making it happen.)

Premise is Gru, a big meanie (but really he's only sometimes mean. And even when he's mean he's funny) decides to STEAL THE MOON, after learning that some other diabolical villain has stolen the Great Pyramid in Egypt. The interchange between him and that other villain (Vector) is where some of the funniest bits come from. That and the minions, who are little green men with one or two eyes and goggles (designed to fit the number of eyes they have.)

The little green men have several really funny sight gags (including once when one grabs another, cracks him, then shakes him, and he starts to glow ala glowstick minion. Perfect!) They also have a funny mumble mumble intelligible word mumble mumble thing they do that's very amusing. There was a fart blaster (done in a really funny way) and a minion butt-photocopying bit (hilarious.)

If you can handle your children seeing some animated minion photocopied ass, you're in good shape. 

Unlike many movies for kids, the low-notes aren't played hard enough to make you cry, the bad guys aren't being mean to children (Gru's meanness is mostly played in a humorous/wry way and it's quickly tempered with his own inadequacies so that you can feel sorry for him.) In spite of being about a super-villain, it was really funny and well worth the $5.75 admission[1].

[1]We did not see it in 3D. The only real knockout parts for 3D would have been a roller-coaster ride about 1/2 way through the film. Not a fan of 3D in general and glad we didn't pay the upcharge, the movie is great and doesn't need 3D to make it better in my opinion.